Under duress

Some souls dissolve

Just like a lollipop under a child’s liking tongue.

The once pliability to decode life’s nuances

Becomes solid, sour

Hidden meanings remain untold

Stay dark.

Of light is made the soul who can rise above the sorrow

Trials, tribulations and many losesses

Shape the noble into kindness, generosity and beauty

Guided by the ability to forgive,

Those who try, can find

The meaning, the light , the fragility and malleability of our many qualities

To dream, to dare

It’s not for the weak.

I, a poem

You, a poem

Together we write the living eulogy of what’s left

We believe in caring for each other

The eulogy of living dreams

Dreamt and lived

Alongside our disappointment , our broken hearts.

This is a simple statement

That we owe to each other,

We outta say it out loud

Those who are not yet completely dead

Inside

Totally killed by outside indifference

Negligence

Not negligent to each other

We can still, yell it , subscribe to it

Write our names here:I, believe in!

A long night

Insomniac thoughts

And some distance from the world.

I walk this threaded line

In solitude but with detachment .

The ‘me’ I know learnt such ways,

That dreams and days are the nights of the soul

That souls are rested in death.

Constituted by moments of true insight

Nights are the moments of deep reflection,

Gaps are not filled by noise,

The calm air that surrounds our void

Unperturbed by the usual human clutter

Finding refuge in knowing, feeling, being

Truly!

A profession of deceit

That’s what we sign up for

The thick air of fake promises

Washes away our humanity

And we chase and we chase

In the hope to never find

Chimeras of our own fabrications becomes the only tangible flesh we hold on to for a while

Because we forgot to be decent

To be humane

To care for the substance of our own soul

For others who we blindly ran into

Into their tears, their despair

We read nothing of ourselves

We continue to hunt and hunt

Blind little creatures

Hiding in corners, yelling out our fears

I don’t know how to describe magic to the un-prepared interlocutors.

That moment you least expect but you prepared for years

Surprising for sure!

Yet, aligned with the right moment

When you, willing, well equipped

Embrace what’s out of your control.

Forever miraculous and with no explanation

With low likelihood of ever happening,

Magic is an irreplaceable instance

When you, accepting and peaceful

Learnt how to savour your human expansion

Enhanced by embracing

Significant and powerful .

How many times a “ good bye” will echo?

As long as memory is intact

A possible answer!

Because those who fade aren’t really

Gone

Less visible, yes!

But alive and vivid for the days we spent

For the memories we formed

Letting go it’s an illusion!

They are warm, and sweet to our remembering

As they were to our lives.

I hang like a question mark

To the eternal questions only time can answer.

Pure reflection never got us any closer

To dilemmas that never fall asleep at night

Closed eyes, searching souls,

We busy ourselves in space

Inside,

Restless insomniac of our own existence

Pitied with inability and sorrow

We shiver like the words of an untalented poet

The more of myself I commission to the world

The least happy I get.

My getting deep into the layers of who I am

Not easy,

Not simple,

But is mission I signed up for.

Time, people, they become subsidies

Not because ‘me’ is so worth knowing

But I’m curious about the process of discovering

Hieroglyphics of my lonely heart

If remained untranslated, I’d be a stranger to my own language

So I verbalise, I use signs, visuals

I create maps so if ‘ me’ remains a stranger to others,

Lost in misinterpretations

At least I know ‘me’

I stand alone but I’m not a stranger

My remains are my own

They feel close and familiar.

Sadness doesn’t have a name

Nor yours, nor mine

It lurks in the shadows

And it sings a lullaby

A song that doesn’t sleep.

We are not young, we are apart

We have little to rejoice over

Because the sadness

Engraved on our minds

The memory of our short existence

Inexplicable and ...

Doom

Homeless

Hungry

Consuming our every step

Lost for meaning

Aimless and pointless

A perfect mirror for our existence.

In my heart,

The dead are not dead

The living haven’t stopped hunting me either.

Their expectations

Still hurting

Demands, written, expressed

Or silent.

They hang more painfully then the worst hangover

Between the lines or

Phrased,

As a final verdict.

The line they drew for me

I crossed it so many times

I lost the path!

The compass to the main road.

The direction, the intention to ever go back

Adrift, the imprints of my steps

Have invented a new way of walking

Not sleep walking.

But a way in which I feel more

See more

Hurt more.

Alone, but alive.

Sad but not broken

But not blind.

Not pretending either.

The unconscious flicks its light on us

From time to time, we glimpse

A smell that turns into a memory

A vision of who we were

Perhaps another ‘me’ that never became

We turn around and it’s gone.

Elusive , hieroglyphical , surfaced for a moment

Returns to be the mystery that guides us from the shadow.

Anatomically lost,

Each piece of the whole

Carries the inner sorry of belonging.

Of once having been

In a place

A space.

Though gone today

Its existence,

Identity, remains.

Because each piece of

Each whole

It’s in itself the whole story

Anyway.